Vivah Sanskar: Hindu Marriage, Pheras and Saptapadi

Vivah begins the grihastha ashrama, the householder stage, which the tradition honours as the support of all the other stages. Husband and wife become partners in dharma (sahadharmini), sharing the duties of family, hospitality, ritual and care for ancestors and society.

Scholars describe the Hindu wedding as the most extensive personal ritual an adult Hindu undertakes. Its outward forms vary enormously across India, but nearly all Vedic-style weddings share a core: the giving of the bride, the taking of her hand before the fire, offerings into the fire and the seven steps.

The sequence differs between regions and families, but the classical core, as given in the Paraskara Grihya Sutra and kept in many North Indian weddings, runs like this:

Kanyadaan: the bride's father (or guardian) gives his daughter to the groom, who promises to be faithful to her in dharma, artha and kama.

Panigrahana: the groom takes the bride's right hand, with its thumb, and recites the hymn of hand-taking.

Ashmarohana: the bride places her right foot on a stone, asked to be firm as stone.

Laja homa and parikrama: the bride's brother pours parched rice (laja) into her joined hands; she offers it into the fire, and the couple walk around the fire. In the Grihya Sutra this is repeated so that there are three rounds, with a fourth offering of all the remaining rice.

Saptapadi: the groom leads the bride seven steps to the north of the fire, one mantra for each step.

After the seven steps, water is sprinkled on the couple's heads, the bride is shown the sun, and the groom touches her heart. In the evening she is shown the Pole Star (Dhruva), and in many traditions also Arundhati, as models of constancy.

The saptapadi is the defining moment of the Vedic wedding. The groom leads the bride seven steps northward, and with each step the officiant recites the mantra for one blessing. The words are short and ancient; the Taittiriya Brahmana has a closely related version ending 'sakhayah saptapada abhuma', 'we have become friends by walking seven steps'. In the tradition, the seventh step turns two people into sakhas, lifelong friends.

Families often ask whether there should be four pheras or seven. The answer depends on tradition.

In the Paraskara Grihya Sutra, the circling of the fire (parikrama) and the seven steps (saptapadi) are two separate acts: the couple circle the fire with the laja offerings, and then walk seven steps to the north.

In much of North India these have merged into the seven pheras around the fire. Scholars note that the bride usually leads the first six rounds and the groom the last, while in parts of Central India the bride leads the first three or four.

In Gujarati and many Rajasthani weddings, there are four mangal pheras, linked to the four aims of life, dharma, artha, kama and moksha, followed by the seven steps. Many families also recite the popular saat vachan, seven promises the bride asks of the groom before she agrees to come to his left side; these vows are part of living tradition and are expressed in many local versions.

North India: baraat, jaimala, kanyadaan, pheras, sindoor daan and mangalsutra, and the bidaai. Sindoor in the parting of the hair is the most visible mark of marriage.

Bengal: shubho drishti (the first gaze, as the bride uncovers her face from behind betel leaves), mala badal (exchange of garlands), saat paak (the bride carried seven times around the groom), kanya sampradan and sindoor daan.

Maharashtra: the antarpat, a cloth held between bride and groom while the priests sing the mangalashtakas, after which it is lowered and garlands are exchanged; then saptapadi.

Tamil Nadu and Kerala (Brahmin and many other communities): the kashi yatra (the groom's mock departure for Kashi), the oonjal swing, the tying of the thali or mangalsutra with three knots, and saptapadi.

Andhra Pradesh and Telangana: jeelakarra-bellam (a paste of cumin and jaggery placed on each other's heads at the auspicious moment), talambralu (showering of rice) and mangalya dharana.

Nepal: a multi-day ceremony with sindoor daan and other rites.

Arya Samaj: a simplified Vedic wedding centred on the havan, with panigrahana, laja homa, saptapadi and vows recited in Sanskrit and Hindi; the Arya Samaj popularised the term 'Vedic wedding'.

Some communities, such as the Nairs of Kerala and the Bunts of Tulu Nadu, traditionally do not perform saptapadi at all and marry according to their own customary rites, which the Hindu Marriage Act equally recognises.

Section 7 of the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 says that a Hindu marriage may be solemnised according to the customary rites and ceremonies of either party, and that where those rites include the saptapadi, 'the marriage becomes complete and binding when the seventh step is taken'. Courts have treated the performance of the customary ceremonies as essential to a valid Hindu marriage. Registration is a separate step and is required or encouraged in many states.